Why I Love Character Meet and Greets

Posted on September 10, 2025 by admin

Last week, I wrote about my recent trip to Animal Kingdom in Disney World. I’m still fondly reminiscing about it, especially the interactions I had with costumed characters. Those are always some of my favorite parts of Disney trips. In addition to thinking about how good they make me feel, I’ve also been pondering why I find their interactions so comfortable and free from fear while most normal human interactions I have are uncomfortable and generally contain lots of fear. Here are some ideas I have about that.

To start, I don’t know if I ever actually met any costumed characters at Disney World until my trip to the Magic Kingdom back in July. If I met any as a kid, I’ve long since forgotten about it. As an adult, it was such a thrill to meet Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Donald and Daisy Duck, Goofy, Pluto, Chip ‘n’ Dale, Russell, and Dug on my two most recent trips. I’m glad I took advantage of the opportunities to see them all instead of letting some initial hesitations dissuade me.

All the characters I’ve met always appear glad to see me and I’m always glad to see them. They welcome me just as warmly as they do with kids even though I’m in my early 30’s. Aside from greeting me with warm hugs and friendly faces, they make me feel safe, comfortable, and excited to be around them due to their familiarity. Since I’ve seen them in movies and shows since I was a kid, I feel totally at ease around them as seeing them is like visiting old friends.

At each character greeting, it always seems like it’s only me and the character or characters I’m meeting. I never have to split my attention between the characters and other guests or vice versa when it’s my turn. They make it extremely easy to forget about all the other guests and make me feel comfortable to act silly, enthusiastically, and have fun with them. Short visits of just a minute or two at most with the characters (and most of my visits have been less than a minute) ensures that the interactions don’t go on so long that they become uncomfortable.

While some costumed characters speak, the fact that all of the characters I’ve met don’t speak gives me more room to talk than I usually get in interactions and also allows for some lovely silent moments, such as when we’re sharing a hug or posing for a picture. That said, I don’t monologue to them or make the whole conversation about me. At Animal Kingdom, I complimented Mickey and Minnie’s cool safari hats, learned about Goofy’s favorite bird to see while birdwatching, and told Russell that he’ll someday get the one merit badge he’s missing. There is a wonderful synergy in creating these wonderful interactions together, whether I or the character introduces a topic or takes the interaction in a particular direction. That is much nicer than the desperation to speak that pervades so many other kinds of interactions and more often than not results in me getting steamrolled and never getting to talk about what interests me while the other participant(s) ramble on endlessly about whatever they want.

It will be no surprise to anyone who’s read my blog a lot that I especially enjoyed meeting the three dog characters: Goofy, Pluto, and Dug. Pluto was my favorite of the three to meet as he acted most like a dog during our visit, such as enjoying a good scratch by his ear and giving me a “kiss” when we said goodbye. Seeing him spin around with excitement when I told him dogs are my favorite animal was also a lot of fun. Visiting with him, Goofy, and Dug reminded me of visiting with my late dog Sawyer and brought me even more comfort than I usually get from character meetings.

Earlier today, I realized one reason that it was so nice to talk with Goofy about bird watching. When my grandparents were alive, I enjoyed sitting with them and watching the birds in their backyard. In fact, one of the gifts my family and I got my grandmother for her final birthday just over a year ago was a bird feeder with a camera so she could watch on her phone any bird who landed on the feeder. While none of that was consciously on my mind during my visits with Goofy, I’m sure it was in there subconsciously.

After getting back from Animal Kingdom, I had a rough week at work. My normal workweek is four days, and last week it was only three days due to Labor Day. Still, each workday was worse than the last, and I felt terrible emotionally by the time the weekend arrived. I wish I could have gotten big hugs from Disney characters throughout that week as I’m sure they would have made me feel much better. That week reminded me how awful folks can be in regular life in contrast to how wonderful they can be at Disney. It also made me wish I could just go to Disney World all day every day and have fun around kind humans while leaving the cruel ones alone to rot in their misery.

I think most of those who work as costumed characters have a lot of love for what they bring to visitors. I can imagine that it might be just a job for some, although I can’t imagine anyone doing that kind of job who hates it. The only time I can see that happening is if someone is truly desperate for work and that’s the only job they can get. There are plenty of other jobs with lots of customer interactions that don’t require nearly as much patience, compassion, enthusiasm, and love as character work. Anyone who has taken classes in acting, improvisation, mime, and so on to enhance their character work has put far more effort into their job than anyone I’ve ever seen in retail, food service, call centers, help desks, etc. All the Disney character interactions I’ve had have seemed as if there’s a lot of love coming through from beginning to end, and I believe that most of those folks are pouring straight from their own hearts with every autograph, high-five, and hug.

Costumed characters always make me feel happy and welcomed. Their big, warm hugs and friendly interactions keep me smiling and feeling good for days afterward. Whether I was already feeling good or down in the dumps, all the characters I’ve met have cheered me up just by being friendly and welcoming me with big hugs, sweet photos, and fun interactions. Several of them have drawn me a heart in the air with their hands! That’s a wonderful way to show love and concern without saying a word. It’s always well worth the wait to meet the characters on Disney trips and I look forward to meeting even more of them on future trips.

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A Wild Time at Animal Kingdom

Posted on September 3, 2025 by admin

Last weekend, I spent two days at Animal Kingdom in Disney World. I primarily went to say goodbye to the Boneyard and the rest of Dinoland, U.S.A. since I’m not sure if I’ll be back at Animal Kingdom before that land goes extinct. The Boneyard closed forever yesterday, so I definitely wanted to check that out while it was still open. I’m glad to say I got to experience Dinoland and all the fun it had to offer, plus plenty of other lovely attractions throughout Animal Kingdom. I’ve got a lot to say about it all, so here we go.

My first day at Animal Kingdom was mostly good. I got to the park a few hours after opening and started off by seeing several animals on trails near the front entrance. When I saw Pluto doing a meet and greet nearby, I hopped in line to meet him. He loved seeing the dog picture on my shirt and spun around with excitement when I told him dogs are my favorite animal. He even gave me a “kiss” when we said goodbye! I then made my way to Dinoland where I rode Dinosaur and had lots of fun meeting Chip ‘n’ Dale by the Cretaceous Trail. That was a lovely surprise as I didn’t know they’d be over there when I went to explore that trail.

By that point, I was ready for lunch. I had a delicious lunch at Restaurantosaurus before going to see the Feathered Friends in Flight! bird show. That was one of the big highlights of my trip. Another huge highlight came from petting and brushing a variety of animals at the Affection Section petting area. Unfortunately, after I looked at the many animals on display inside the Conservation Station, I walked outside to find rain. The poncho I brought with me helped quite a bit, although some of my pockets still got soaked. Fortunately, everything in them was ok. Unfortunately, the rain and some power issues affecting all of Disney World meant several attractions closed down early. I finished off the day by having some delicious chocolate ice cream and meeting Mickey and Minnie Mouse. That cheered me up a lot and brought the first day in for a smooth landing.

Fortunately, day two was even better. There was no rain in the park at all! Traffic was so light that I got to the front entrance of the park right after it opened. I rode one of the first Kilimanjaro Safaris of the day and still saw a fair number of animals despite the early voyage. After that, I rode Expedition Everest in no time flat thanks to the single rider line. That gave me enough time to get back to Conservation Station where I watched Dr. Dan examine a dove before generously answering a lot of guest questions. After petting the animals again, I thoroughly enjoyed coloring a butterfly wristband before meeting Donald Ducky, Goofy, Daisy Duck, and Russell and Dug from Up.

Then it was back to Conservation Station for more animal pets and the Animation Experience. The instructor taught us how to draw Minnie Mouse. I enjoyed that a lot and was surprised how well mine turned out, given that I rarely ever draw. Once that class ended, I stopped off for lunch at Restaurantosaurus again, met Goofy once more to talk with him about bird watching, and decided to meet Minnie and Mickey again to show them the drawing. They both loved it and signed it for me! Things took a bit of a negative turn after that when I realized I wouldn’t get to see Festival of the Lion King or ride Kali River Rapids before the park closed. I’m glad to say I still got to see the wonderful Finding Nemo: The Big Blue… and Beyond! live stage show. I finished my day in Animal Kingdom by looking at animals on several of the trails, walking through the Boneyard, and saying goodbye to all of Dinoland. After exploring the Rainforest Cafe located just outside the front entrance, I went on an unexpected journey to ride the Skyliner before heading home.

For this trip, I used the last two days of a four-day ticket I bought back in June; the first two days got me into the Magic Kingdom on Independence Day weekend. Similarly to my previous Disney trip, I stayed with a friend who lives close to the park. I also made a spreadsheet of the wait times and duration times for the attractions I most wanted to experience just like I did with the Magic Kingdom. That helped immensely with planning, strategizing, and also giving me enough time to enjoy the park at a slower pace while still accomplishing almost everything that I wanted to do plus enjoying some other unexpected activities.

Indeed, the only attractions on my list that I didn’t get to experience were Festival of the Lion King and the Kali River Rapids. Not bad considering how much extra stuff I got to do and the fact that Animal Kingdom is open for fewer hours than any other Disney World theme park. While I feel a bit upset that I didn’t get to experience those two attractions, I have hope that I can experience them on a future trip since I haven’t heard of any plans to remove either of them. If I could do it over again, I’d have done the same activities with more efficiency and possibly gotten to the park earlier on the first day to free up enough time to do everything on my list.

I feel a bit sad that I didn’t get to see and say goodbye to It’s Tough to Be a Bug! as that show closed down in March. I didn’t have nearly enough money then for a Disney trip, so my final time seeing the show was many years ago. While I did watch a YouTube video of the final It’s Tough to Be a Bug! show shortly after it closed, I would have loved to have seen it in person one last time. Similarly, I wish I could have said goodbye to Chester and Hester’s Dino-Rama. That was a part of Dinoland that paid homage to old roadside attractions and carnivals with rides, games, a restaurant, and a gift shop. While the remains of that area finally closed this year, it was gradually going extinct for years as more and more parts of it were removed. I’ll miss the fun it brought, and I’ll especially miss seeing the big, smiling Cementosaurus statue who greeted visitors until he was demolished earlier this year.

The most frustrating part of my trip was the Skyliner adventure. Although I succeeded in riding the Skyler and had fun onboard, doing so meant that I didn’t get home until around 12:30 am. If I’d skipped the Skyliner, I’d have gotten home about three hours earlier. I think there was a much more efficient way to get to the loading station than the way I ended up taking, especially considering how backed up the buses got. Better yet, I wish I’d ridden the Skyliner during my trip to Disney’s Hollywood Studios in late May. There is a loading station right in front of that park, so that would have been incredibly efficient if I’d ridden it back then, plus I would have gotten home from Animal Kingdom much earlier than I actually did.

Another upsetting part of the trip was my inability to find a particular pressed penny machine that made dinosaur pennies. I wanted to get some as souvenirs from Dinoland before that part of the park closes forever. Despite learning that the machine was supposedly in Restaurantosaurus, I couldn’t find it anywhere. I posted about this on social media earlier this week and offered to pay back anyone who manages to get me some pressed pennies on their next Animal Kingdom trip. Shortly afterward, a friend of mine kindly bought the ones I wanted online and is sending them to me! I look forward to seeing them when they arrive and displaying them alongside my Muppets and Liberty Belle riverboat pressed pennies from previous Disney trips.

Many of the smaller experiences were among my favorite parts of this trip. I loved walking the trails and seeing the many animals along each one. That reminded me of visiting my local zoo and allowed me to see other kinds of animals that I don’t normally get to see. Drawing was even more enjoyable than I thought it’d be, and coloring the butterfly wristband (which was a total surprise as I didn’t know that was an available activity) was so relaxing. I loved how both the coloring and the drawing allowed me to be creative and enjoy the process without trying to force a certain outcome. Just as Bob Ross always talked about how painting is supposed to make you feel happy, the drawing instructor reminded us several times that we can choose what details we want to add and that the process is meant to be a fun activity for us to do while we’re on vacation.

As you’ve already guessed if you’ve read my blog in the past, petting and brushing the animals was my favorite part of Animal Kingdom. While I’m used to petting goats and stingrays at my local zoo, the Affection Section allowed me to pet some sheep, a pig, and a donkey. That might have been my first time petting and brushing those animals as I don’t have any recollection of doing that anywhere before. I’m so glad I got to pet the super soft sheep, sleepy pig named Dottie, and sweet donkey. I teared up a bit while saying goodbye to all the animals since some of them might die before I go back. It’s fairly common for me to do that ever since my dog Sawyer’s death, especially with animals that I’m going to be away from for a long time.

I absolutely loved meeting the costumed characters as well. They always make me feel happy and welcomed. Their big, warm hugs and friendly interactions keep me smiling and feeling good for days afterward. As nice as it was to meet Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Daisy, and Goofy again, I’m so glad I also got to meet Pluto, Chip ‘n’ Dale, Dug, and Russell. That was the first time I recall meeting them, and it was well worth the wait to meet them all. I look forward to meeting them and other characters on future trips.

In addition to the costumed characters, I had several other lovely cast member interactions. My favorite interaction was with a cast member near the Affection Section who told me about a special animal show later in the day, gave me a butterfly wristband to color, and talked with me some about Chip ‘n’ Dale since we both love those characters. She appreciated seeing a picture I had gotten with them the day before. I loved talking with her as her personality was so warm, kind, and grandmotherly. That was an extra special interaction to me since it’s now been just over a year since the last time I visited with my maternal grandmother and next month will be a year since her death.

Aside from all the attractions, I enjoyed simply walking around the park and taking in everything. I think Animal Kingdom has the best theming and immersion of any of the Disney World parks. While that also makes it the most confusing park for me to navigate, it’s worth it for the beauty, atmosphere, and relaxation it brings as I explore.

I’m so glad I went to Animal Kingdom and had such a lovely time there. Although I’m glad I got to ride Dinosaur, explore the Boneyard, eat at Restaurantosaurus, and enjoy the rest of Dinoland, I wish they were all sticking around. It’s always painful when things I love go away, especially things I’ve loved since I was a little kid. Despite the painful losses and some unexpected issues, I’d say the Animal Kingdom trip was more enjoyable, pleasant, and soothing than any other Disney trip I’ve taken this year. It might even be my favorite Disney trip I’ve ever taken. I look forward to going back someday and revisiting the wonderful rides, shows, characters, theming, and animals.

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Tribute to MOSH

Posted on August 27, 2025 by admin

Last Saturday, I went to my local Museum of Science and History, or MOSH. This museum has been around in some form since 1941, and it’s been in its current location since 1969. Since it is moving into a new location soon, that sadly means that it is closing down by September 1st. As such, I wanted to give a little tribute to the MOSH I’ve known all my life and also provide some awareness of its imminent closing in case anybody wants a last visit (or a first visit) while it is still in its current location. Here’s an overview of the museum and some of my experiences there over the years.

MOSH is laid out over several floors, with each floor having both interactive and display-only exhibits. The scientific exhibits include some live animals in an outdoor pond and indoor naturalist section, a planetarium show, and lots of information about aquatic mammals. The historical exhibits primarily focus on Florida history, though there is some inclusion of major events from the US and elsewhere in the world. There is also a space that hosts multiple different exhibits each year, one of which is a roomful of dinosaur animatronics (including one that can be controlled by museum visitors). While some parts are definitely aimed at kids, MOSH has something for visitors of all ages to enjoy.

I’ve had lots of fun times at MOSH over the years. Most of my visits were school field trips in elementary and middle school, though I also went there with family members on occasion. One of my few visits in my adult years was when I went swing dancing there back in 2018 for a special exhibit called Mission: Jax Genius. I and several other folks dressed up vintage style clothes and danced in honor of Frankie Manning, who was one of the most influential figures in Lindy Hop history and was celebrated at the exhibit as he was born in Jacksonville, Florida. Afterward, some of us went out for more dancing at Hyperion Brewing Company (which, sadly, closed down in 2024). That was one of the nicest micro adventures I went on in 2018.

My recent solo trip was lovely. I had lots of fun exploring MOSH after many years of being away, seeing lots of old favorites, checking out some new stuff, and watching/participating in the planetarium show. Aside from the show, some of the biggest highlights were petting a cool turtle named Gooter by the pond and seeing the animals in the naturalist section. In addition to taking lots of pictures, I got some pressed pennies, a simple bag backpack, and a MOSH map as souvenirs. It was a bittersweet visit, both because of the museum’s imminent closing and also because it was my first (and likely only, at this point) time going there since my dog Sawyer and my grandmother died. I’m glad I got to say goodbye to the MOSH I grew up loving and all the fun times it’s given me. This closure is yet another painful loss in a long line of painful losses in my life going back many years at this point. I’ll miss MOSH where it was, and I hope the new location is wonderful.

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Ella Enchanted, Fawning, and Boundaries

Posted on August 20, 2025 by admin

Many years ago, I saw parts of a movie called Ella Enchanted (some spoilers to follow). It follows a woman named Ella who was cursed as a baby to be obedient to a fault. She does whatever anyone tells her to do, even if she doesn’t want to do it or if it breaks the laws of physics. Recently, I realized how that idea can be an allegory for a specific trauma response that I’ve dealt with for most of my life: fawning.

In short, fawning is a trauma response in which you give in to whatever someone else wants in the hope that they will not hurt you or will stop hurting you if they are already doing so. This is often learned as a kid in order to stop abuse from parents. As sad as that is, it’s even worse when fawning continues into and throughout adulthood. This creates all kinds of issues with people pleasing, failing to stand up for oneself, giving in to bad things, rejecting good things, and so on. In the worst cases, this occurs in every relationship, whether familial, friendship, work, social, etc.

Although I’ve had plenty of experience with all of the four main trauma responses, fawning is by far my most common response. I’ve long felt intimidated by others, whether out of hoping they’ll like me or at least avoid hurting me, so it’s been far too easy for me to put their wants ahead of my needs. Some particularly traumatic experiences and misguided self-improvement work have exacerbated this. It got even worse after my dog Sawyer died. Since then, it’s been overall harder for me to say no, set and maintain boundaries, and avoid going along with others’ expectations of me due to the pain of Sawyer’s death and life without him. Even though this has eased up some as I’ve healed, it’s still worse now than it was when Sawyer was still alive.

There is some good news. Last Saturday, the Plushie Dreadful fawn I ordered arrived. He’s brought me so much comfort in the short time he’s been here. I named him Little Ian, both because he reminds me of how I was as a kid and also so that I can comfort both of us by saying nice, sweet, gentle, and loving things to him and myself by extension (both present me and my inner child) when I call him by his name. That’s been so helpful lately.

I also started rereading Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend and picked up Letting Go by David Hawkins from where I left off a few months earlier. Aside from bringing up lots of painful emotions, they’ve also been great reminders of wonderful things that have helped me tremendously in the past and have given me new ideas on how to remove the fawn response. It’s too soon to know if there’s been any lasting change from getting back into them, though.

My hope is that Little Ian, those wonderful books, and more emotional and boundary work will gradually bring me more confidence and peace. It’s hard to say if that will happen, given how much I’ve struggled with fawning throughout my life, and how each small amount of progress seems to be more than offset by a huge regression later on. Whether it happens soon or much farther down the road, I hope that they will help me to become free, just as Ella was able to become free after breaking her curse. I hope to have good news to report on this soon.

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A Few Teaching Tips

Posted on August 13, 2025 by admin

I’ve been thinking a bit about teaching and learning lately. Since I started my current day job, I’ve learned quite a bit. Most of that learning has come from one particular coworker who is excellent at explaining things in ways that make sense to me and encourages me to keep learning by highlighting the things I do well. That’s exactly how I learn best and explains why I’ve learned almost nothing from another coworker who is relentlessly negative, criticizes excessively without ever giving compliments, and only explains things in ways that make sense to him. As such, I wanted to share some things I’ve picked up from teaching people about juggling, unicycling, and other fun, random stuff. Without further ado, here are my tips for teaching.

  1. Make learning fun. This is perhaps the most important point on this list. Someone who doesn’t enjoy what they’re learning is extremely unlikely to continue with it. In contrast, someone who has a blast with the process will stick with it for a long time. I’ve learned a bit about spreadsheets just by playing around with them and looking up how to do particular tasks when I can’t figure it out on my own. In addition to being fun, that has taught me more about spreadsheets than I’d have learned had I treated it as a chore or been pressured by somebody else to learn how to use them. While some subjects may be more inherently enjoyable than others, any subject can be made interesting by someone who knows how to inject fun into the process.

  2. Teach a bit at a time. There are students of every subject under the sun who’ve studied it their whole lives and are still learning new things about it all the time. As such, it’s important to go slowly to avoid overwhelming students with far more information than they can handle. A few new things learned each day will add up over time to a huge mountain of knowledge.

  3. Encourage, encourage, encourage. Learning new things can be difficult and stressful. Why make it worse by discouraging someone and only focusing on the mistakes they make? Instead, focus on their successes and celebrate with them. It helps to point out how far they’ve come, especially if you’ve worked with them for a good while and have seen lots of progress. You might see progress they’ve missed, so be sure to point it out so that they can feel encouraged enough to stick with it rather than quitting during the difficult times.

  4. Be gentle. Criticism is one of the most difficult things to properly give. Some folks, including me, have a hard time handling criticism in general. Even those who can better receive it still can only take so much before giving up. Accordingly, point out what someone is doing well before gingerly focusing on areas for improvement. Additionally, you can use an accusation audit to soften the pain of criticism and make it effective for improvement rather than counterproductive. I’ve said before on this blog that being gentler with my dog Sawyer than almost anybody else in the family is what endeared him so much to me. As with animals, so with humans.

  5. Let them figure out some things on their own. Clearly, this is only to be done some of the time. If this were done all the time, then there’d be no need for anybody to teach anybody else anything. That being said, anything that you learn for yourself will stick with you much longer and much deeper than something someone else tells you. I like to think of this as giving somebody two plus two and letting them add it up rather than simply telling them the answer.
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Stop Asking Me the Question

Posted on August 6, 2025 by admin

When I used to work in jobs with lots of customer interaction, I’d often hear the same questions repeatedly from different customers. I quickly grew sick of answering them, especially if they were difficult to answer or required lengthy answers. While it may have been any given customer’s first time asking me that question, it may have been my fiftieth time answering it. Although I no longer have to deal with those repetitive questions at work, there are still questions I’m sick of getting elsewhere in life. Here are some of the ones I wish others would stop asking me, just as Tom Wilson says in his question song.

  1. “What do you do for work?” This was one of the most common questions I got when I was meeting new people regularly. Sometimes they would simply ask, “What do you do?” While suspecting that they were talking about work, I would still try to steer the conversation in another direction by talking about what I liked to do. Almost always, they’d interrupt me, ignore everything I just said, and ask, “No, I mean what do you do for work?” That instantly put me off of them, both for asking a boring question and also for interrupting me while simultaneously dismissing all the stuff I said I enjoy. Aside from shyness, the fact that this question almost never comes up anymore is a reason I’m glad to not be regularly meeting new people at this point in my life.

  2. “Are you going to shave your beard?” I don’t get why anyone asks that question, or the variation asking me when I’m going to shave, as if that were ever an option. I never hear anyone ask someone if they’re going to shave their head or any other hair on their body. Since I haven’t shaved my beard in almost a decade, plan to keep it for the rest of my life, and never talk about shaving, why does anyone think to ask me that? I’ve never asked any other guys that question, and I dislike the subtle implication that the person asking wants me to shave. I grow my beard for myself, so I’ll do with it as I like, regardless of what anyone else thinks about it, particularly those who voice criticism about my beard.

  3. “What?” Any other variation of that (“Huh?” “What did you say?” “What’s that?”) also fits in this spot. No matter how loudly and clearly I try to speak, those around me almost always ask me to repeat myself. Some in particular say it almost every time I say anything to them, which is extra annoying. This doesn’t just stem from being in a loud setting as it still happens when I’m in a quiet location. It annoys me greatly, especially when I’ve just said a lot or said something that took a lot of effort to say. The fact that those who tend to not hear or understand what I say are often the same folks who tend to interrupt or ignore me the most (or just simply avoid paying any attention when I speak) adds even more frustration. Sometimes I just say, “Never mind” instead of going through the struggle of saying it all again one or more times; if I then have to give a lengthy explanation of what I’ve said three or more times, then I’m even less inclined to repeat myself. I wish everyone would quiet down and lean in to hear me better, pay me more attention, and listen without interrupting while I’m talking.

  4. “Are you going to get another pet?” This is the repetitive question that I hate the most. I’ve heard this countless times since my dog Sawyer died. Sometimes it comes from friends or acquaintances I’ve known for years and other times it comes from new acquaintances after they learn about Sawyer. Even though this is nowhere near as bad as telling me to get a new pet, which some folks have also told me to do, I still hate being asked this question. Not the least because there’s usually also pressure to adopt another animal friend, regardless of what I say in response or if I’m able to take care of an animal even if I wanted to get another one. I’m tempted to ask whoever pressures me to adopt an animal how much money they will give me to take care of that animal, given that animals require lots of money to properly care for (in addition to time, vet visits, enrichment, attention, and love). I’m glad nobody has asked me this question in a long time, and I hope I can talk about Sawyer in the future without anybody ever asking me it again.
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My Big Reset

Posted on July 30, 2025 by admin

In Toy Story 3, Buzz Lightyear gets reset to demo mode. This makes him forget his friends, causes him to speak and act as he did for most of the first Toy Story movie, and makes him subservient to the main villain. Later, his friends manage to turn him back to his usual self. As odd as this might sound, that does a good job describing my life over the past several years.

If you’ve read any of my posts since 2022, then you’ve probably seen references to my dog Sawyer, his death just over three years ago, and the tremendous amount of pain that that caused me. The day Sawyer died, I regressed almost immediately to feeling scared, sad, and angry almost all the time. It was as if all the progress I had made over the past few years with emotional intelligence and feeling better all went away in an instant. I was back to having all the anxiety, anger, and depression that I had after graduating from high school. My shyness skyrocketed, as did the fear and discomfort I felt around most other humans.

Although I’ve released a lot of pain and feel much better now than I have in years, I still have far more struggles than I did before that horrible reset. The openness I had in social situations is largely gone. Both the pain of losing Sawyer and the pain of many humans taking advantage of me has caused me to close up and only show my heart to a handful of trusted humans. I fear being taken advantage of and hurt all over again. I rarely go out socially anymore, especially when it’s just to talk or hang out with others and there’s not a major activity to focus on. This is all compounded by the fact that I have much less time now to work through lingering pain than I did over the last few years, which also makes it much harder to progress at this point. As such, I still haven’t gotten back to the high level of peace, joy, and inner strength I had in September 2021, or even the fairly comfortable level I was on just a few days before Sawyer died. I don’t know if I ever will get back to either of those places or to an even higher place, and I fear that I won’t.

There are some things that give me hope that I will return to that wonderful state of being. One of them is how much pain I’ve released in the years since Sawyer’s death. It’s easy for me to forget at this point just how miserable I felt, and sometimes I don’t notice how much better in comparison I feel now. Releasing all that pain has allowed me to hold down a steady day job once again without breaking down in tears or otherwise being unable to work due to overwhelming pain. The healing plus the money from my job have both allowed me to thoroughly enjoy my trips to Disney’s Hollywood Studios and the Magic Kingdom this year. Going to both parks by myself and having so much fun at each one showed me that I’m still able to go on adventures, have a great time, and make wonderful memories along the way.

My life feels like it’s finally settling down after many years of turmoil. I’ve gotten used to my job schedule and have figured out how to make good use of my time away from work, especially on the weekends. Although my mood is still far lower than it was for part of 2021, it’s much higher than it was for most of the years since 2022. That’s encouraging. I hope to continue having fun adventures, releasing old pain wherever I can, hanging out with lots of cool animals, and maintaining good relationships with a few good humans. That, I believe, is doable.

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A Magical Trip to the Magic Kingdom

Posted on July 23, 2025 by admin

I spent the first two days of Independence Day weekend this year having an incredible time at the Magic Kingdom in Disney World. I’ve got a lot to say about it, so here’s an overview of my trip.

On July 4th, I left the house much later than I planned. After a few stops for gas and food, I got to the Magic Kingdom around 3pm. I spent some time listening to Grayson the amazing pianist at Casey’s Corner before listening to a bit of the Dapper Dans on Main Street. My next stop was Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room. That was my first time seeing the show, and I’m so glad I saw it. It was a fun, lovely, relaxing show. Shortly after that, I heard a whistle blow. Thinking it was the train, I turned around and was delighted to see the Liberty Belle riverboat about to set sail! That was pure magic. I ended up riding the Liberty Belle around the Rivers of America and then exploring Tom Sawyer Island later in the afternoon. It was wonderful to revisit them both after so many years away. Since they both closed forever right after my trip, I was extra glad to say goodbye to them and have fun on them one last time. In fact, that’s the whole reason I went to the Magic Kingdom.

That first day was pretty slow going until nightfall. I enjoyed some chocolate ice cream and a delicious root beer float right before the big fireworks show started. During the show, I rode a bunch of rides with little to no wait time! That got me through more than half of my list on the first day. It was also amazing seeing fireworks from the PeopleMover. Altogether, I did about 13 attractions that day, including exploring the Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse that wasn’t even on my list. I finished with Pirates of the Caribbean right before the park closed. After a lengthy exit process, I got to the place I was staying around 12:30 in the morning. That was the best Independence Day I’ve had in years.

Unfortunately, the second day was extremely mixed. I felt upset after getting a much later start that I had planned. I felt quite a bit better after visiting with and receiving so much love from two dogs that morning, including a super friendly throwback Pomeranian! Fortunately, the place I stayed was only 20 minutes away from the Magic Kingdom, so I was back in the park a bit after noon. The first thing I did was listen to the Dapper Dans again. That cheered me up a lot, as did riding the train all the way around the park shortly after. I wish I’d met Winnie the Pooh and Tigger after riding The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh right next to their meet-and-greet. Still, I had a blast on that classic ride.

Things took a bad turn a few hours after I got to the park. Nearby lightning resulted in temporary shutdowns of both the Liberty Belle and Tom Sawyer Island. Although I ended up taking two rides on the Liberty Belle that day, I didn’t get to explore Tom Sawyer Island on the final day of my trip due to bad weather and time management issues on my part. I also didn’t end up riding Peter Pan’s Flight or the Astro Orbiter at all that weekend, which were the only attractions on my list I didn’t experience. That plus some other negatives had me feeling awful. Fortunately, as I talked about in an earlier post, I cheered up a lot after meeting Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Daisy Duck, and Goofy. Some delicious ice cream, a few more pictures for the memory book, and one last ride on the Carousel of Progress finished my trip. A few hours later, I was back home in my own bed.

Unlike my previous Disney trip in which I just watched MuppetVision 3D at Disney’s Hollywood Studios repeatedly throughout the day, I did almost everything the Magic Kingdom had to offer on this trip. Because of that, and because this was my second solo Disney trip and my first solo Disney trip that lasted more than one day, I did more planning for it than I’ve done for a trip in a long time. I looked up the duration time and average wait time of each attraction I wanted to do, plugged them into a spreadsheet, and came up with a rough estimate of how long it would take me to do them all. I pared the list down a few times until it focused on the attractions I most wanted to do and gave an estimated time to experience all those attractions that seemed possible to complete within two days. Aside from being fun to make and play with, I’m extra glad that the spreadsheet gave me enough confidence that I didn’t buy any Lightning Lane passes or otherwise spend more money in the hope of getting shorter wait times. I’ve almost finished creating a similar spreadsheet for a different Disney trip next month that I’m sure will also serve me quite well there.

This was such a great trip for my inner little kid. Most of the time I was in the Magic Kingdom, I felt like a little kid getting to do as I wanted, see old friends, and have fun in my own time. I especially loved riding the Carousel of Progress on July 4th and hearing the dad character talk about drinking root beer on July 4th before enjoying a root beer float afterward. I’m glad I made that the last attraction of my trip since the final scene reminds me of my grandparents’ house and the grandfather character reminds me so much of my maternal grandfather. I also loved seeing Rover the dog character as he reminded me of my dog Sawyer, especially since he received a gift during the Christmas scene just like how Sawyer received gifts every Christmas.

I’m so glad I got to experience so many nostalgic attractions and try some new ones on this trip. That’s comforting to me since massive changes have already been made to the Rivers of America, Liberty Belle riverboat, Tom Sawyer Island, and the train. Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin will also undergo refurbishment in the near future, so I’m glad I got to ride it while it still matched my memories. I so wish I’d explored Tom Sawyer Island on both days, met Winnie the Pooh and Tigger on the second day, and ridden Peter Pan’s Flight and the Astro Orbiter at some point that weekend. I also wish Big Thunder Mountain Railroad hadn’t been closed for refurbishment as that was the only attraction I wanted to do that I couldn’t do at all on either day. Still, I had fun with everything I did get to do. If I end up going back to the Magic Kingdom, I will prioritize any attraction I wanted to do this time and didn’t end up doing as long as it is open on my next trip. I think I’ll go back again someday. Even though this was meant to be my final visit to the Magic Kingdom, I had such a wonderful time despite the difficult moments and felt such lovely nostalgia that the thought of never going back again devastates me. Since I got back, just thinking about the good experiences makes me smile and cheers me up when I’m feeling down (as did writing this post). I’m glad this trip was as good as it was, and I hope the next one will be even better.

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Transactions and Relationships

Posted on July 16, 2025 by admin

Much as I hate to admit it, I find transactional relationships much easier and less stressful than non-transactional relationships. Here’s what I mean.

By “transactional,” I mean relationships that are mostly or even exclusively based on what one or both participants can do for the other. For example, A is buying groceries and B is ringing up those groceries. Neither one needs to know much about the other, and neither probably cares much about the other outside of the transaction. That isn’t needed for the transaction to be successful. In contrast, a “non-transactional” relationship would be one that isn’t based on either participant doing something for the other. Friendships are a good example. Two friends can go for extended periods of time without interacting and pick up right where they left off. They might have lots of lighthearted moments rather than focus solely on helping each other through challenging situations. However, they are much more likely than transactional relationships to feature heavier moments, greater challenges, and each participant hurting the other at some point (even if the hurt was unintentional and unknown by the one who did it until the other brought it up). As such, non-transactional relationships are much more stressful to me than transactional relationships.

There’s not much involved in giving someone information I have or helping them do something I can easily do. Such interactions are also generally pretty quick, and I might never again see someone I’ve assisted, especially if I’ve done so in a job setting. In contrast, non-transactional relationships are much deeper and require much more nuance, understanding, important (and often difficult) conversations, patience, and overall work. They also take a lot of time to develop and deepen, and they can last for an entire lifetime. I suspect that that’s why non-transactional relationships can also drain me much faster and much more thoroughly than transactional relationships.

However, there is a downside to transactional relationships. They will sometimes disguise themselves as deeper relationships. Lots of humans I’ve known have used me for what they wanted (control, peace, venting, gossiping, etc.) and not wanted anything deeper with me. While some make their intentions clear from the start, it sometimes takes a long time for me to realize that someone only cares about me as long as I can help them get what they want. It’s always hurt to find that someone I cared deeply about only saw me as a means to their various ends and had little to no interest in me outside of that (and such folks have often left me when I no longer was useful to them).

This applies almost exclusively to human relationships. With animals, I find non-transactional relationships incredibly easy. Whether I’ve known a particular animal for a long time or we’ve just met, we get along famously. That was certainly the case with my dog Sawyer, and he helped me feel much more comfortable around animals in general, especially dogs of all sizes. When almost everyone else I knew wanted to get something out of me, Sawyer just showed me love, kindness, consideration, and compassion. I wish all of my relationships were that way.

Unfortunately, humans seem to be seeking transactional relationships more all the time as the world continues moving toward greater speed, convenience, and ease. As such, I doubt that I will have more non-transactional relationships over time. All I can do is enjoy the meaningful relationships I do have, minimize the transactional relationships as much as possible, and continue appreciating my own company when nobody else is around.

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2 Mice, 2 Ducks, and a Dog

Posted on July 9, 2025 by admin

I got back early Sunday morning from a trip to the Magic Kingdom in Disney World. While it was amazing, there were some painful times that I’d rather not discuss (aside from saying that I cried in a bathroom stall when I hit my breaking point). Fortunately, I felt upset in one of the best places in the world in which to feel upset. Here’s what I mean.

After a good cry, I decided to meet some of the costumed characters. On my way over to Main Street, Grayson the pianist cheered me up by playing some Muppet songs that somebody else requested and “Step in Time” (along with a medley of other Mary Poppins songs) that I requested. I then met Mickey Mouse at the Town Square Theatre. We high-fived, hugged, took some pictures together, and he signed my park map. I felt so good after that that I decided to go meet some other characters. Unfortunately, although I had noticed Winnie the Pooh and Tigger next to the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh ride earlier, the opportunity to meet them had already ended for the day by the time I went back over there. I carried on and got to meet Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Daisy Duck, and Goofy in Mickey’s Storybook Circus. Just like with the Mickey meeting, we hugged, high-fived, shook hands, posed for pictures, and talked a bit. They all really cheered me up during the hardest part of my trip. When I went back to meet Mickey a second time later on, I told him how much better they all made me feel when I was feeling really upset earlier. He listened intently while quietly showing me support and then drew me a heart in the air with his hands! That made my whole day, and I’d even say it made my whole trip.

I felt more loved and valued from those wonderful character moments than I have from most humans I’ve known throughout my life. I teared up while talking to Mickey during our second visit and cried pretty well from joy later on. Since none of those characters speak when they’re interacting with guests, there wasn’t the opportunity for any of them to start talking about their own pain or anything else along those lines when I shared my feelings. There was also no unsolicited advice, “good vibes only” stuff, or anything similar that almost everyone I know compulsively resorts to when I talk about feeling upset or having a hard time. Quiet support, kindness, hugs, and love were what they all gave me. That’s exactly what I wanted and needed. I appreciate them for making me feel so much better.

Those character experiences reminded me of a few things. One of them is how much better I feel after good hugs. I don’t get enough good hugs in regular life, so getting ten or more great hugs in one day made me feel wonderful. The other is that I still feel like a kid in a grownup body. Just as it doesn’t take much to make me smile, neither does it take much to make me feel awful. Since the world is full of mean humans (and since I have to deal with one of them at my job), I wish I could opt out of adulthood and become a little kid again. I wish I could play all day with my stuffed animals while going to Disney World regularly and then tell my grandparents about my trip at their house as we’re all hanging out with my dog Sawyer. It hurts whenever I remember that those days are gone forever, at least for my remaining time on Earth. I hope I’ll find something like that after I die.

I’m so glad I got to have those wonderful character moments. They saved my trip, and they were among my favorite experiences in the Magic Kingdom last weekend. I hope to have many more such comforting experiences, and I’d love it if they came from those close to me without my having to beg and plead for them. That’d be much easier, cheaper, and overall more convenient than driving hours to an expensive theme park to get them. I guess time will show who cares about me more: those close to me who claim to appreciate me or strangers who go above and beyond at their jobs.

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