Review of The Tipping Point

The Tipping Point is a phenomenal book written by Malcolm Gladwell. It is an extremely insightful and interesting exploration of how small things can make a huge difference in starting and shaping epidemics (Gladwell uses the term “epidemic” to refer more to social and cultural trends than to the spread of disease). Gladwell covers a lot of ground in the book, so here’s what stood out to me the most.

Gladwell discusses three kinds of people who play a role in epidemics. The first type are the connectors; these are people who know a lot of other people. They may not be close friends with everybody they know but they regularly keep in touch with them and are deeply fascinated by learning a lot about other people. If you want to get a message or an idea out to a lot of people, you could send it to everyone you know but a better approach is to send it to a connector and ask them to send it out. Next are the mavens, who know a lot of stuff. Marketplace mavens can tell you where to get a good deal on a new car, what to look for in a TV, which hotels are worth staying at, etc. They can give you all kinds of good information about products, prices, and deals in the marketplace. Marketplace mavens aren’t the only types of mavens, however. Although he doesn’t refer to himself as such, Gladwell fits the definition of a maven. He collects information on a wide range of subjects. The more information you have, the more connections you can make between seemingly separate bits of information and the clearer the big picture becomes. Mavens are real helpful if you need to know where to go to get something specific or if you just need to know a lot about a few subjects. Then you’ve got your salesmen. Pretty self-explanatory: they can persuade people to buy, sell, trade, or join a cause or organization. They’re helpful for getting people to support your ideas once they’ve heard your message. All three of those types of people are important in creating tipping points and starting epidemics.

There are other factors involved in getting things to tip, such as context. For example, Paul Revere’s ride was likely as successful as it was because it took place at night when most people were home to receive his message and knew it was urgent due to the lateness of the hour. There’s also the matter of how contagious something is. While this term is usually refers to the spread of diseases, Gladwell uses it in discussing how easily an idea or message spreads. A non-contagious trend might never move past a handful of people while a contagious trend can encompass a whole country or even the world. Additionally, there is the stickiness of a trend. Even if a message reaches millions people, they might quickly forget about it and move on, which means the message didn’t stick. In contrast, a sticky message can stay with them for years and may even make them change their behavior. You don’t need a lot of big things to change the world; you can start a worldwide movement just by getting a few small things right, and it can happen much faster than you think.

One of the things that stood out to me the most came from the chapter on smoking. In that chapter, Gladwell said that some people smoke because they’re depressed. Nicotine temporarily boosts dopamine and norepinephrine levels and helps depressed smokers feel better, which means that they’re essentially treating their depression by smoking. Accordingly, those who smoke because they’re depressed have a much easier time quitting if they are given effective treatment for their depression rather than if they’re simply told how bad smoking can be for their health. This was a wonderful example of how directly addressing the problem itself is a much better strategy than trying to manage the symptoms of the problem, a message that applies to quitting smoking as well as everything else in life.

Malcolm Gladwell really outdid himself with The Tipping Point. I don’t know how he found out all this stuff or pieced it all together but I’m glad he did. He saved me a lot of time by compiling everything into this book so that I didn’t have to go on a big scavenger hunt to learn what he discusses. The Tipping Point is incredibly profound, fascinating, encouraging, and inspiring to me and I’m sure it will help me in my quest to change the world. Plus it’s easy to read and understand since Gladwell writes in plain English, uses lots of stories to illustrate his points, and clearly explains what he means every step of the way. In closing, whether you just want to know how epidemics occur or you want to change the world, I highly recommend checking out this book. It’s a great read and has been, and I’m sure it will continue to be, instrumental in changing the world for the better.

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Getting the Most out of Your Float

I’ve floated almost 60 times as of this writing and in the process I’ve learned a lot about how to maximize the experience for myself. Floating affects everyone differently and no two of my floats have been exactly the same, so I hesitate to say that I’ve found the perfect formula for everyone. However, I do think there are some actions that will increase any given person’s chances of having an enjoyable experience. So without further ado, here are my recommendations for getting the most out of your float.

  1. Book your float when you have a day off and have almost no other plans. This will allow you to relax afterward and fully process and enjoy the experience without having to rush off right away. If you can, have your first float at night so you can go home and go to bed for some amazing sleep.

  2. Eat decent meal and drink a decent amount of water a few hours before your float. While you’re in the pod, you should feel comfortable rather than hungry and dehydrated or stuffed and over-hydrated.

  3. Avoid consuming alcohol, caffeine, and sugar a few hours before and after your float. Those can negatively affect your experience while floating and take you out of the post-float glow after your float.

  4. Arrive early to make things easier on yourself and the float center employees. If it’s your first float or your first float at this particular location, listen attentively during the orientation so you know what to do and how the process works. Ask any relevant questions that you have before you start your float.

  5. Use the restroom before you float so you feel more comfortable in the pod and can stay in until the session is over.

  6. If your pod has an adjustable lid and fills up before you get in, then keep the lid shut while the pod is filling so it gets warmer inside. The water should be close to body temperature, so it’s not like getting into a hot tub or a hot bath.

  7. Shower before you get in the pod. Start with a warm shower and slowly turn the temperature down as cold as you can stand it. That will make the water in the pod feel even warmer in comparison.

  8. Put in your ear plugs before showering so they seal better and are less likely to fall out of your ears while you’re floating. If they’re the foam kind, rolling them between your fingers and holding them in your ear until they fully expand also helps.

  9. Float nude so you avoid getting distracted by clothes or a bathing suit.

  10. Get in before the pod finishes filling, shut the lid, and keep it shut the whole time to maximize your experience and keep it warm. If you get too warm in there, open the lid a few inches to vent some of the heat until you’re comfortable again. Better to start too warm and cool down than to start too cool and try to warm up.

  11. Go in without expectations. Accept whatever happens in there, whether you fall asleep, have a meditative experience, get some creative ideas, work through difficult emotions, get reminders of things you can do better in life, etc. The float might not give you what you want but it will give you what you need, so embrace whatever it gives you.

  12. Focus on your breath and breathe more slowly on the exhale than on the inhale to calm your body. If you start feeling anxious, remind yourself that you’re ok and try to watch your thoughts and feelings without getting stuck in them. Breathing slowly through your nose and from your diaphragm will help you with this.

  13. Try out several positions until you find a comfortable one to float in. Change positions as needed to relieve pain, restlessness, or discomfort. Otherwise, try to keep still and let your body rest by relaxing all your muscles and allowing the water to fully support you.

  14. It may take you a while to fully get into the experience, especially if it’s your first float. After 20-30 minutes, you’ll probably be in the “float zone” and start seeing how incredible it can be.

  15. Shower afterward to rinse off all the salt, get dressed, and, if you can, take some time to stay at the float center and bask in the post-float glow before returning to your normal life.
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The Daily Stoic: “Stake Your Own Claim”

This entry from The Daily Stoic resonates a lot with me. I used to rely heavily on other people for my ideas. If I liked what someone said, I tended to take what they said as gospel without thinking it through or looking at it from other angles, or thinking much for myself. I still love listening to what certain people have to say but I now take everything with a grain of salt, especially if I’m listening to someone I really like. My thoughts and perspectives aren’t always as consistent as they once were, and that’s fine with me. I like that I’m thinking more for myself now, so having some inconsistencies doesn’t bother me. I’d rather have those inconsistencies than depend completely on somebody else to think for me. Whether or not I can work out all the inconsistencies and contradictions in my thinking, I plan to continue thinking for myself, finding value wherever I can, and sharing my ideas with anyone who will listen.

“For it’s disgraceful for an old person, or one in sight of old age, to have only the knowledge carried in their notebooks. Zeno said this… what do you say? Cleanthes said that… what do you say? How long will you be compelled by the claims of another? Take charge and stake your own claim – something posterity will carry in its notebook.”

-Seneca, Moral Letters, 33.7

Musing in his notebook about the topic of immortality, Ralph Waldo Emerson complained how writers dance around a difficult topic by relying on quotes. “I hate quotation,” he wrote. “Tell me what you know.”

Seneca was throwing down the same gauntlet some twenty centuries before. It’s easier to quote, to rely on the wise words of others. Especially when the people you’re deferring to are such towering figures!

It’s harder (and more intimidating) to venture out on your own and express your own thoughts. But how do you think those wise and true quotes from those towering figures were created in the first place?

Your own experience has value. You have accumulated your own wisdom too. Stake your claim. Put something down for the ages – in words and also in example.

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“How the Big Band Stole Christmas” (And My Anxiety)

Last night, I got to be part of the Crescendo Amelia Big Band “How the Big Band Stole Christmas” show in Fernandina Beach. I briefly unicycled in front of the stage during one of the songs and juggled in the lobby during the intermission. I also got to listen to the show from backstage and sit with the audience toward the end. As always, Crescendo Amelia and everyone else in the show did a spectacular job and I’m so glad I could be part of it. This was the first time I’d performed since I juggled at the previous Crescendo Amelia Big Band show at Theatre Jax earlier this month. Last night was also the first time I’ve performed with my unicycle. I thought it went quite well considering that I couldn’t unicycle at all this time last year and I’ve only gotten really good at it within the past few months.

On my way home from the show, I had a startling realization: I realized that it had been a while since I felt so good. Although I had a little anxiety on my way to the show, most it went away once I got there. I had a bit when I unicycled and a bit more later when I started juggling, but that was about it. The rest of the time, I felt fine talking to and being around other people. I enjoyed myself and felt calm, relaxed, and happy. That was such a nice contrast to how I’ve felt lately. I’ve been feeling stressed and down for much of this week. Some days I get quite stressed out at work and I often find myself feeling stressed even on my way to work. When things are going well, I tend to start wondering how long that’s going to last before things start going downhill. With all that in mind, last night’s show was a breath of fresh air. Getting out of my usual routines and being in a situation that was purely positive made me feel wonderful. Plus I had far fewer responsibilities than I do in other areas of my life. I just had to go out there, do my best, and have fun, and that’s exactly what I did.

I did my best at the show and felt like I didn’t let myself or anybody else down. Getting away from stressful, complicated situations and into simpler, nicer situations made me feel amazing last night and I still feel pretty good today. Also, even though I was super tired by the time I got home since I had been awake for almost 20 hours, I don’t remember feeling tired after performing or interacting with anybody. That was another nice change of pace as I’ve been feeling very drained from many of my interactions this week. Those are my takeaways thus far from last night and I’m going to keep thinking about it to see what else of value I can use in my regular life. This has the potential to do me a lot of good and I’m excited to see where it goes.

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Leaving a Legacy

People who try to stay relevant by always talking about current events end up making themselves dated. They’re relevant for a while, sure, but if all they’re doing is focusing on current events, then what happens when those events are no longer current? What happens when people aren’t thinking about that stuff anymore? They lose relevance. If you want to leave a legacy and have a chance of being remembered well after you’re gone, your best bet is to talk about things that are always relevant. Talk about the things we all have in common: our emotions, hopes, dreams, worries, fears, foibles, flaws, our ability to suffer, concerns about death, big questions about life, the desire to live the best life we can, and everything else that we as humans share. All of that is just as relevant now as it was in ancient times and transcends cultural differences. That’s why people who wrote about this stuff back then are still remembered and discussed today. They tapped into things that we can all relate to no matter where or when we live.

What’s more, you can increase your chances of being remembered by offering a unique, interesting, and useful perspective on principles that stand the test of time instead of simply saying what everyone else has already said about them. You might also inspire someone to take your ideas further than you had ever thought possible and make a major breakthrough. However, even parroting the perspectives of other people (while giving them credit for their ideas) gives you much better odds of leaving a lasting legacy than talking about the trivial matters of daily life that are hot for a moment but quickly cool off and fade away, like a message in the sand that washes away when the tide comes in.

In contrast, all the stuff that’s just as relevant today as it was millennia ago and will be just as relevant millennia from now is like a sturdy castle. Nothing is going to erase it from memory or cause it to become lost to time. That castle has long outlived the people who made it and will stick around for a long, long time. Anyone who sees it can think about the people who made it, just as those who come after you can look at what you had to say and remember you as they do. So don’t try to be relevant now by talking about the day-to-day fluff because that will make you become dated before you know it. Instead, talk about the stuff that sticks around and your impact will stick around, too.

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Half the Battle

The first few days of this week were pretty rough for me and I was super tired by Tuesday night. I talked to a few friends before going to bed and they both gave me a lot of good things to keep in mind that I just wasn’t ready for. On some level, I knew that what they were saying was correct but I wasn’t in any position to apply it that day. I wasn’t even willing to use the life hacks that I talk so much about on this blog. I didn’t do any deep breathing, meditate, or listen to anything encouraging on YouTube. I just marinated in my feelings. Yesterday, I felt much better and did a lot of stuff that I didn’t do the day before. Among other things, I meditated, did breath work, stretched, went to the gym, read a lot, and juggled for a minute or two (plus I had the day off work, which is always nice). Needless to say, Wednesday was a much better day for me than either of the previous two days, and as of today I still feel better than I did earlier in the week.

There is a lot of value in the stuff my friends told me Tuesday night as well as in the life hacks I’ve been collecting for a few years now. However, even though I wasn’t in the mood to use what they told me that night, I was still able to receive it at the time and use it the next day; it stuck with me despite how I was feeling. I think it also helped that I spent a lot of time on Tuesday fully feeling my emotions instead of trying to push them away or bury them. That made me feel better and made it easier to use my life hacks on Wednesday.

It’s worth continuing to learn, study, and find useful things. Even though I’m not always ready to use what I’ve learned right away, there will come a time when I am ready, so it helps to have it available when that time arrives. I don’t always understand something until I’ve heard a few people discuss it from different angles, and I often learn something from one person that allows me to make sense of what I’ve heard from another. I’ve found that out through many of the books that I’ve read. Reading several books on similar subjects really helps me understand and remember the material. For example, reading The Righteous Mind last year made it much easier for me to understand Thinking, Fast and Slow this year as both books discuss the same basic concepts. So I’m going to keep learning, studying, and collecting information because I never know when I’ll be ready to use it and how it will help me when I need it.

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Adventure Motivation

I’ve talked before about my dream of traveling around the continental US in a camper van and seeing the cool stuff and the hidden gems in each state. Lately, I’ve been thinking about all the stuff that there is to see and do around me. Some of that stuff is in nearby states but a lot of it is in my own city and costs little to no money. Despite this, I hardly go on any adventures on my own. For example, I’ve been to the Jacksonville Zoo and Gardens three times in the past few months because someone invited me each time. The zoo is about half an hour from me, I always enjoy going there, and I can easily afford it, yet I can’t remember going there even one time by myself. Additionally, there are several parks within easy driving distance from me that I’ve been to and greatly enjoyed (such as Ichetucknee Springs), lots of neat little things to do in Jacksonville, and St. Augustine is within an hour’s drive, yet I rarely ever do any of that unless I’m going with someone else. I’ve been to St. Augustine a number of times but only once by myself, and the only reason I didn’t go with anyone that night is because my intention to meet up with some people I know there didn’t happen. So if I don’t take advantage of cool, affordable activities around me now, then why would I pursue much bigger activities later on when I’m by myself in new cities and states?

Several people I know go on small adventures (and sometimes big adventures) by themselves: going on major retreats, moving across the country, attending workshops and weekend events, etc. So why do I hardly do anything special outside my house without being accompanied by at least one person that I know? Maybe my reserved nature has something to do with it. It helps me to go with someone I’m comfortable with; that makes it easier for me to meet new people, try new things, and check out new places. But I don’t think that’s the whole story. I think part of it is the joy that comes from sharing wonderful experiences with those close to me. As amazing as many of the things I’ve done have been on their own, a great part of that wonder has come from being able to do them with friends, including dance workshops, juggling festivals, park visits, weekend adventures, and day trips. So that might affect my ability to go on and enjoy a big road trip around the country without anyone with whom to share the experience.

However, I’ve also been thinking about some of the activities I’ve enjoyed doing by myself, a few of which were at the Florida Theatre. They once showed Buster Keaton’s silent film Steamboat Bill, Jr there with live music to accompany it and I enjoyed seeing it even though nobody I knew went with me. More recently, I saw Steven Wright perform there and had a blast. And I still enjoyed the time I ended up going to St. Augustine by myself; walking around looking at all the Christmas lights, listening to Christmas music from a live band, and seeing the beautiful city was a wonderful way to spend an evening. These are some of the small adventures I’ve loved despite going alone, and I’m sure there will be many more in the coming years. Whether they’re as nice as the events I’ve shared with other people depends on the types of events and who’s around me. I’ll enjoy the experience more if I have meaningful people around me while people with whom I feel little to no connection would probably make no difference. There are also experiences that I enjoy more when I’m alone, such as floating. Floating in solitude and then having alone time afterward to process everything is much nicer than having a lot of people and other distractions around me. This was especially the case with my first float; the only person around me worked at the float center and gave me plenty of space to bask in the post-float glow.

At this point, I don’t think I’ll need to have a road trip buddy to enjoy things like seeing the sunrise in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, touring some amazing bookstores out West, camping out underneath a starry sky, or anything else I plan to experience. With a lot of the things I’ve done, someone inviting me to an event was an easy way to get me out of the house and gave me a reason to do something that I otherwise might not have thought to do. Once I got started, I found many things to enjoy at the zoo, parks, workshops, festivals, performances, and everything else I’ve done. Even if I didn’t have pleasurable company with me, I’m sure I still would have found those experiences meaningful. I hope this means that all I need to undertake an adventure is to have a reason to go and that I can find such a reason outside of the people I know. If nothing else, I can always share my adventures on this blog so you can enjoy them with me. Most likely, it’ll be years before I put this to the test on my big road trip. I don’t think I’ll be in a position to go on that trip anytime soon, so I’ve got plenty of time to plan, prepare, grow, and figure out how to make the most of it before undertaking it, and I hope to have many more wonderful adventures along the way.

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The Daily Stoic: “Know Thyself – Before It’s Too Late”

I agree with this entry from The Daily Stoic in that lots of people don’t know themselves. I think I know why that may be: self-knowledge is difficult. Examining yourself and knowing yourself inside and out can be quite draining and even demoralizing at times. Shedding light on your psyche can reveal a lot of unpleasant things lurking underneath the surface, so self-knowledge is definitely not for the faint of heart. The insights it provides can be incredibly valuable, however, so I still think it’s worth pursuing.

“Death lies heavy upon one who, known exceedingly well by all, dies unknown to himself.”

-Seneca, Thyestes, 400

Some of the most powerful and important people in the world seem to have almost no self-awareness. Although total strangers know endless amounts of trivia about them, celebrities – because they are too busy or because it hurts too much – appear to know very little about themselves.

We can be guilty of the same sin. We ignore Socrates’s dictum to “know thyself” – often realizing we have done so at our peril, years later, when we wake up one day and realize how rarely we have asked ourselves questions like: Who am I? What’s important to me? What do I like? What do I need?

Now – right now – you have the time to explore yourself, to understand your own mind and body. Don’t wait. Know yourself. Before it’s impossibly late.

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Running on Fumes

In the West, so many people are addicted to the idea that production is all that matters. They’ve been raised to believe that we should always be busy making things, putting things together, and figuring things out. So they glorify workaholics. They adore the people who are burning the candle at both ends and burning the midnight oil. These are folks who are working all the time at their jobs to put food on the table and take care of themselves and their families but end up with very little time to enjoy their families, friends, and interests. There is also the struggling entrepreneur, who, while working at a regular job, starts working on either starting or growing their business from the time they get off work until early in the morning; the next day, they wake up early to go to their job and start the whole cycle over again. They’re getting hardly any sleep, have hardly any time to themselves, and they spend their whole day working from the time they wake up until the time they go to bed.

Additionally, lots of people see life as one big competition. They think they’ve got to be constantly working, moving, maneuvering, out-thinking, outsmarting, and outwitting others just to stay even, let alone to get ahead. Is it any wonder that people are so stressed out and have so much trouble getting along with each other? In addition to constantly pushing against other people, they’re constantly pushing themselves to go further and be faster, smarter, and better. This is madness and it’s unsustainable.

That’s what a lot of people think of when they think about being successful. They think that if they’re not constantly working, then they’re wasting their lives and they feel useless. They feel bad about taking some time out for themselves to take a nap, go for a walk, or go on vacation. While there’s nothing wrong with producing, building, and creating, when that becomes compulsive and you feel as if you have no other option but to do those things all the time, then it becomes a problem. When the idea of stopping or even slowing down becomes unthinkable, that’s when you’re long overdue for a break. I agree with the idea of creating a lifestyle with built-in breaks so you don’t get overworked and burnt out, and I’d like to see more people do that. Until then, though, I think everyone should carve out a sufficient amount of time for self-care, pursuing things they enjoy outside of work, and showing love and grace to themselves.

The harder you work, the more you need to make time for yourself. It reminds me of the story of the Buddhist monk who says he has to meditate for an hour every day. When someone else tells him that he doesn’t have for that, the Buddhist monk says, “In that case, I need to meditate for two hours every day.” You can only push yourself at top speed for so long before you break down. The busier you are, the more time you need to spend not being busy. That’s largely missing from the West and it’s a big part of why there are so many problems in so many areas of life. So many people are running on fumes and still trying to make everything work, and that doesn’t work. I hope that changes soon.

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Responsibility in Communication

Perspectives vary greatly from one person to the next on where the responsibility rests in messaging and communication. Some people put the responsibility on the shoulders of the messenger. They say that the messenger must craft a message in a way that is understandable, appreciable, and applicable to the listeners and, if the listeners don’t get it, then it’s the fault of the messenger. Other people would turn that on its head by saying that it’s not the messenger’s fault if the listeners don’t get the message; you can have the best message in the world, crafted and delivered in the best way possible, and some people still aren’t going to get it.

As for me, I think the right answer is somewhere in between. I do my best to communicate in such a way that the listener understands what I’m saying and I will clarify as best as I can if they are confused. Most people I talk to understand what I’m saying by the second or third time if they don’t get it after the first time. However, there are some people who just aren’t interested in hearing what I have to say. I try out a few different approaches with those people until I realize that they don’t care, at which point I move on. No matter how well I’ve worded and delivered my message, some people are never going to get it because they don’t want to get it.

For the most part, though, I take the Extreme Ownership mentality: if someone doesn’t understand me, it’s my responsibility to go back and clarify again and again until they understand. That way I’m not blaming them or getting frustrated at them and I’m looking at things I can control (my ability to speak and word a message) instead of things I can’t control (their ability to listen and understand). I also don’t get frustrated at myself with this mindset. If one of my approaches doesn’t work, I simply try other approaches until one does work, and I make a mental note of how it went so I can do better next time. Other people almost always understand what I’m saying after a few attempts, but if I’ve made a dozen or more attempts and have still gotten nowhere, then I start thinking that this person doesn’t want to understand me, so why continue wasting my breath? That’s my take on responsibility for understanding in communication. I think it’s the messenger’s responsibility in most cases, but when the messenger has done all they can to be understood, then it becomes the responsibility of the listener. I do think, though, that it’s always the messenger’s responsibility to figure out who wants to understand and who doesn’t. I hope this has been helpful and I’ll see you in the next post.

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