Encouragement

Posted on November 21, 2018 by admin

If you take some time to think about the people in your life whom you most appreciate, you’ll probably find that they are all encouraging. Everyone needs some encouragement, whether they’re going through a rough time or a smooth time. In the former scenario, encouragement helps people get back on track; in the latter scenario, encouragement helps them stay on a good path and take care of themselves. 

The most successful people in the world have had coaches, support groups, or simply people who saw their potential and the possibilities they could manifest and encouraged them to follow their dreams. Who knows how many people decided to stop harming themselves, started one or more successful businesses, or stood up for an unpopular yet important cause because they received encouragement from someone close to them? And think about all the other people who benefited from their positive action; they wouldn’t have gotten those benefits if not for the encouragement given to the initial person. You never know how much impact you can have on another person with even a small gesture of encouragement.

It’s amazing what an encouraging word can do for someone. I’ve heard it phrased as “speaking life into people” and I love that. I’ve seen two versions of a great quote about this and each one is attributed to a different person. I like both, so I’ll include the one attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson here:

“Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be.”

And the one attributed to Johann Wolfgang von Goethe here:

“If you treat an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and could be.”

Everyone responds differently to encouragement but I’ve never seen anyone feel worse after receiving it than they felt beforehand. If someone didn’t appear to feel better after receiving some encouragement, it may just be that they felt it but didn’t show it, showed it differently than most people, or showed it later on once that good feeling had had time to settle in and take root. 

Encouragement is sometimes overlooked until it is absent. Nowhere is its absence more apparent than when spending time around draining, discouraging people who always bypass the positives and go straight to the negatives (even if the negatives are imaginary). After being around discouraging people for even a small amount of time, an encouraging person is like a breath of fresh air and provides welcome relief from the negativity. 

I like encouraging other people because I enjoy seeing them succeed, particularly when they didn’t think they could. I have many encouraging friends and I love the feeling I get when they speak life into me. Having the chance to give someone else that feeling is a wonderful way to pay it forward. Additionally, speaking words of encouragement to others also encourages me and motivates me to shoot for the moon. Part of this comes down to my desire for my words to match my actions and another part comes down to the fact that we as humans start to believe the things we say the most. If I’m regularly saying positive, encouraging things to other people, then it’s easy to keep my thinking aligned in that same fashion. In closing, I’ll leave you with these questions: who has been a major source of encouragement in your life, and what are some ways that you’ve used to encourage the people you know? 

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100 Posts and Some Reflections on the Journey Thus Far

Posted on November 20, 2018 by admin

This post is a special milestone in that it is my 100th blog post. When I started this blog, I decided to make one post each day for as long as possible. And, just as I had planned, I have not missed a single day since I started blogging back in August. I’ve learned a good bit from the journey thus far and I’d like to talk about some things I’ve noticed.

Writing about my ideas has helped me remember them in everyday life, especially when it comes to life hacks. Whether I’ve found something on my own or learned about it from someone else, I can recall useful things more easily once I’ve sat down and thought them through. This is helpful in stressful situations as those are the only times when I need life hacks, so having easy access to them is essential for getting back to a good place. I’ve always known that writing something with a pencil or pen aids in remembering it later and it’s nice to see that this is also the case for writing on the computer. 

Except for the time I was in Georgia for Classic City Swing 7, I’ve written something every day; I wrote and scheduled a bunch of posts in advance so I wouldn’t have to write anything during that trip or go without posting for that span of time. No matter what I’ve had going on in my life, I’ve found time to think of an idea and flesh it out into a blog post. I’m surprised that I’ve managed to accomplish this because, while there have been a few occasions in which I’ve had a plethora of ideas, there have been many more times in which I’ve struggled to either come up with an idea or figure out how to express it. Still, I’ve always found inspiration somewhere and I’m glad that I’ve stuck to my goal.

Something that motivates me to keep writing is the feedback. I’ve gotten a lot of good feedback about my posts. Several people have told me on multiple occasions that they enjoy reading my thoughts, find value in some of my ideas, and appreciate my writing style as well as my consistency in posting. It’s one thing if I benefit from the stuff I talk about here, but when other people find value in it as well, that tells me that it truly has value and I’m not just tricking myself into thinking it works. Since I’ve long wanted to leave the world better than I found it, this positive feedback has been wonderful to hear and lets me know that I’m on the right track.

Now that I’m 100 posts in, I have a pretty good idea of what I’m doing and I plan to keep going for as long as I can. My writing should improve over time but that will be the only change in the foreseeable future. I’m still going to keep writing about things I enjoy and make my life better, and I’m going to continue putting up a new post every day. I do benefit from writing out my ideas as I mentioned earlier, but what I truly love about having a blog is that it lets me easily share my ideas with other people. To everyone reading this, whether you’ve followed along from the beginning or jumped on board somewhere along the way, thank you. Thank you for reading my ideas, for giving me positive feedback, and for telling me how some of my posts have benefited you. I’m grateful that you’ve joined me on this journey and I look forward to seeing where it takes us next. 

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Tracking Progress

Posted on November 19, 2018 by admin

I’ve learned a variety of different skills in my life. Some of them were fairly easy and took little effort, while others required years of practice before I felt comfortable with them. Since most of these have been physical skills, it’s been easy to see and feel the progress over time. I can feel a juggling pattern get easier and more natural, notice how swing dancing has gradually required less conscious effort, see the time it’s taken me to solve a Rubik’s Cube steadily decrease over the years, and so on. When it comes to self-improvement, though, I find it more difficult to remind myself of my progress than I do with physical skills. Thinking of self-improvement as just another skill at which I can improve over time has helped me a lot.

When I think about any area of my life, I’m reminded of how much better each one is now than it used to be. Everything from my finances to how I interact with other people to how I take care of myself has improved significantly over the past year. This isn’t always easy to remember when I’m feeling stressed, though. That’s when I tend to forget my progress and fall back into old, negative mindsets and habits. Reminding myself how far I’ve come encourages me to keep going during the difficult times. I’ve started making extra efforts to do this when I first start feeling negative, which often gives me just the right boost to stop the negativity in its tracks before it has a chance to take root and drag me down.

Taking note of my progress has also helped me see where my efforts could be improved. I’ve made more progress in some areas than others, so being aware of my standing shows me where I’m doing ok and where I need to devote more attention. This doesn’t mean thinking badly of myself for falling short in these areas, which is something I used to do a lot more than I do now. It simply means acknowledging that I’ve made a lot of progress in every area, that I still have room for improvement, and that I can and will do better. 

My view of self-improvement has changed a lot over time. I originally saw it as something that other people can do but I couldn’t and now I see it as something at which I can make continual progress as long as I continue working on it properly. Like every other skill, sometimes I make a lot of progress and sometimes I make very little, and there are occasional lapses where I feel like I’ve regressed. At this point, though, I’ve learned enough life hacks to keep me mostly on a good path and get me back on track when I lose my way. I’m going to continue tracking my progress so that I can keep in mind how much I’ve improved and use it as motivation to go even further in the future. 

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Nights of Lights

Posted on November 18, 2018 by admin
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The Tini Martini in St. Augustine, Florida decorated for Christmas

Every year, St. Augustine, Florida is decorated extensively with beautiful Christmas lights in a celebration called Nights of Lights. There is a special ceremony at the start of Nights of Lights in which the lights are first turned on and lots of people flock to see it. I was fortunate to see it firsthand yesterday. Here are the highlights from the experience. 

The main event was in the Plaza de la Constitución Gazebo. They had a band playing Christmas music and counting down to the big moment when time drew near. There was additional entertainment earlier on but I arrived after it had already ended. A lot of lights were already glowing as I made my way to the gazebo, so I was confused and wondering if I had missed it. However, once I got to the right place, I saw that there were still many lights that had yet to be lit up. After the countdown, the switch was thrown and everyone cheered and applauded as they admired the lights. I spent a long time walking around the gazebo and taking pictures of anything cool that I saw.

When I was through exploring the gazebo, I wandered down several other streets and admired their lights and decorations. I rarely take more than a pictures when I go somewhere and I often end up taking none at all. It’s usually not something I think much about and I have several friends that take good pictures when we go out together. When it comes to Christmas lights and decorations, however, I always enjoy photographing them. I made sure to capture a lot of things I wanted to remember later on, my favorite of which I included in this post. Once I had done all I wanted to do, I went back to my car and headed home. 

I had been hoping to see some friends and do a bit of swing dancing that night, but things took a different turn (literally, as you’ll see in the next few sentences). Because they had closed off several streets, it took me much longer to find a parking spot than it normally does down there. Eventually, I got a place to park with the help of a friend who messaged me and made my way over to the festivities. I was either too late or in the wrong place to meet up with my friends who were down there, so I didn’t end up dancing that night. Despite this, I still greatly enjoyed seeing all the lights, listening to the music, taking pictures, and walking around the city. It was a nice night and I’m glad I was there to enjoy what it had to offer. 

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Tribute to Jim Henson

Posted on November 17, 2018 by admin
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Jim Henson and Kermit the Frog

Most people today are probably more familiar with the Muppets than the man who made them. That man was Jim Henson and he did a lot in his short life. By the time he died from pneumonia in 1990 at the age of 53, he had created a colorful cast of Muppets who touched the hearts of everyone who watched them. 

Born in 1936 in Greenville, Missouri, Henson started working with puppets while still in high school. After making several successful television commercials, he created Kermit the Frog, one of the most recognizable Muppets, in 1955 out of ping pong balls and an old coat that once belonged to his mother. A few years later in 1958, he started what would later become the Jim Henson Company. Unlike many other puppeteers at the time, Henson used the camera to define the boundaries of the action instead of building a physical frame in which the characters would perform. He designed sets and used camera angles to keep the puppeteers out of sight while still allowing them great freedom of movement with the characters. This, along with the ways in which the characters were performed, made them more lifelike than most other contemporary puppets. 

Henson’s first major success came in 1969 when he was hired to work on the show Sesame Street. The show became popular largely because of the characters he helped create and perform. Over time, the show’s success allowed him to get out of making television commercials and focus more on his own projects. These projects include, but are not limited to, The Muppet Show, Fraggle Rock, Labyrinth, The Dark Crystal, and a number of movies starring classic Muppet characters. 

The Muppet productions made during Henson’s life featured enjoyable music, realistic characters, great comedy, fun adventures, and touching life lessons. While the Muppets are well known for their comedy, it can be easy to overlook the sad moments where all seems lost and their hope is gone. These moments tug at our heartstrings because Henson figured out how to tell engaging stories with puppet characters so brilliantly that we forget they’re puppets. Each Muppet has a distinct personality and feels like a fully-formed, relatable character. This makes it easy and natural to laugh when they laugh and cry when they cry. We want to see them succeed because we see ourselves in them. Fortunately, there are many wonderful moments in which they do succeed. My favorite Muppet moment is when Kermit sings “Rainbow Connection” in The Muppet Movie. I can’t explain why exactly but that song means a lot to me and perfectly matches how I’ve always seen my role in the world (plus Kermit is my favorite Muppet and I see a lot of myself in him). I remember crying happy tears at that song when I first heard it well over a decade ago and to this day it still makes me tear up.

Jim Henson may be gone, but his heart lives on in each of his Muppets. Whether or not we grew up watching his work, we all have plenty of opportunities to enjoy it and the many wonderful characters he created. His works are great for wholesome, touching, quality entertainment for people of all ages, which is why I greatly admire him. I’m glad I grew up watching his works and have the chance to share them with all of you in this blog post, and I look forward to sharing them with my future family someday. 

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A Feeling of Importance

Posted on November 16, 2018 by admin

Les Giblin talks about how everyone wants to feel important in How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing With People. In a segment of the book about why employees often feel frustrated at work, Giblin provides these reasons: 

  1. Failure to give credit for suggestions
  2. Failure to correct grievances
  3. Failure to encourage
  4. Criticizing employees in front of other people
  5. Failure to ask employees for their opinions
  6. Failure to inform employees of their progress
  7. Favoritism 

Giblin concludes that segment with the following paragraph: 

Notice that every single item has to do with failure to recognize the importance of the employee. Failure to give credit for work says, “Your work isn’t very important.” Failure to correct grievances says, “You are so unimportant that your grievances don’t amount to anything,” and so on.

I absolutely agree with him and I think these same issues cause problems outside the workplace as well. I think showing genuine appreciation for someone and respecting them are key to having successful relationships. The people I most enjoy being around are those who have consistently treated me well and made me feel loved, which is why I try to give other people those same good feelings whenever I can.

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Fear

Posted on November 15, 2018 by admin

The driving force behind so many actions is fear. Fear of failure, fear of being hurt, fear of not being liked, fear of losing control, fear of loss, fear of the unknown, and countless other types of fear. Instead of dissolving or overcoming that fear, many people are controlled by their fear and act (or react, to put it more accurately) based on it. Although this can manifest in different ways, it always introduces some degree of negativity whenever it appears. 

Some people avoid others or act aggressively around them. In both cases, their actions are largely based on the fear of being hurt by other people, so they either try to hide or scare them away. Either course of action may backfire and bring to them the very thing they tried to avoid, such as increased attention or possibly even violence; even when one of those courses of action works as intended, it reinforces behavior that almost always causes problems elsewhere in life for whoever practices them.

There are many cases in which people desire power over others. In most of these cases, this desires comes from their fear that other people may harm them if have the power to do so. Whether or not anyone else actually wants power over them or wants to harm them (which may be a projection of their own desires onto others) is irrelevant because their fear is based on an idea created by their mind. That provides enough motivation for them to try grabbing that power before anyone else can get it and use it against them. Hence the violence and desperation around most power struggles. 

There are many possible positive or negative outcomes for any given situation. Wanting the outcomes to be positive is perfectly understandable, but worrying about them does nothing to facilitate that. All that does is make it impossible to enjoy a situation and increase the chances of a negative outcome. Someone who’s afraid is trapped by their mind and can’t be comfortable or content. If fear keeps them trapped, then overcoming fear is what sets them free.

Learning how to relax, stay present, and hold space for oneself is essential for having the peace of mind required to vanquish fear. When fear is defeated, there is room for love to enter and begin to heal. The only way two people can truly be close to each other is when love has replaced fear in their relationship. This is difficult since so much of what goes on in the world is based on fear, but a relationship built around love is the strongest and most healing type of relationship. The world would be virtually unrecognizable if love relationships were the norm, and I hope to live long enough to see that happen. 

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Review of Think and Grow Rich

Posted on November 14, 2018 by admin

A few days ago, I finished reading Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. I had heard of this book before I bought it but I didn’t know much about the author or the message. Now that I’ve finished it, I’m glad I checked it out, and I’m definitely going to be referencing it regularly.  

As suggested by the title, Think and Grow Rich is intended as a resource for making money. Hill encourages you to think of the amount of money you want and the date by which you would like to have it. However, despite Hill’s focus on the importance of visualizations and positive thinking in reaching your goals (often called the “law of attraction”), he doesn’t say to simply hope and wish for success and then expect it to magically appear. Instead, he advocates coming up with lots of ideas, making them into a practical plan, and then working on that plan until you get what you want; he also acknowledges that you may have to come up with more than one plan to arrive at your goal.

Hill spends a great deal of the book talking about maintaining a positive mindset, learning how to overcome fear, and getting to truly know yourself. He also includes a lot of useful information on how to eliminate negative thinking through self-awareness and self-improvement work. I love all of that stuff and had previously published a blog post about his take on leadership. I think the book is an incredibly useful resource in all areas of life, not just in the pursuit of wealth. 

I greatly enjoyed Think and Grow Rich. Although the book’s stated purpose is helping people make money, it offers so much more than that to anyone who learns and applies its lessons to their life. I think it will help me a lot in my business ventures as well as in my everyday life. This is a wonderful book and I highly recommend you check it out. Think it over and decide if you want to use it to enrich your life in any of the many ways it can help you do so.

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An Ounce of Prevention

Posted on November 13, 2018 by admin

You may have heard the saying “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” It simply means that it’s better to consistently maintain something than let it lapse and then try to get it back to where it was before. While normally mentioned in the context of health, it can be applied in other areas as well. I’ve recently realized how I should be focusing more on prevention in my own life.

It’s easy for me to take the good times for granted and lose track of what makes them good, which is maintaining a positive mindset. When I’ve had a positive mindset for a week or longer, everything goes more smoothly and it begins to feel like that’s just the natural order of the world. Eventually, though, I start to slip up: I let little things get to me, think and negatively about someone or something, complain, dwell on things I dislike, etc. If I catch myself in time, I can put a stop to the negativity and return to feeling good. However, if I miss the window of opportunity, I end up sliding into a negative state of mind and stay there until it becomes unbearable. That’s when I go back to using life hacks to keep me in a positive mindset and things start getting easier again. 

While this has been a regular pattern in my life for several years now, it wasn’t until this year that I discovered its cause. Knowing the importance of controlling my mindset is key to breaking this pattern and staying consistently positive. I suppose this is the logical progression; identify the pattern, figure out the cause of it, and then learn how to eliminate the cause. Each step has been more difficult than the one before it, which is probably why this pattern has continued in my life.

Fortunately, I’ve learned a lot of life hacks that help me snap out of a bad mood or avoid getting into one in the first place. I’m going to work more on using what I’ve learned from The Power of Positive Thinking, The Four Agreements, and The Power of Now to smooth out and, I hope, eliminate this pattern. I’d rather spend some time every day taking care of myself and maintaining a positive mindset than keep returning to a negative mindset and spending a lot of time getting out of it. I hope that writing this blog post will serve as a reminder to me to control my thoughts and use that ounce of prevention to keep me in a good place each day. 

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Dancing Under the Stars

Posted on November 12, 2018 by admin

This past Saturday, I drove to Gainesville, Florida for a night of dancing under the stars. The people in the Gainesville swing dance scene put on this magical event once a year and this was my first time going, but I can tell you now it won’t be my last. 

I got to Depot Park just before 7 pm, right about when the lesson was ending and just in time for the main dance. I met up and danced with several of my friends from Jacksonville; more of them arrived later on after getting some food. One of my Jacksonville friends was the DJ that night and he did a great job. Hours of terrific, fun music right in the “sweet spot” for swing dancing: just the right speed for triple steps and all the wonderful things they offer, and fast enough to be fun but not so fast that it wears you out. 

This was my second time swing dancing in Gainesville and my first time dancing there for just one evening. My first time dancing in Gainesville was in March of this year for the Sweet Swingouts weekend workshop. Just as I did back in March, I enjoyed dancing with the people from the local dance scene as well as my friends from the Jacksonville scene. Since the two cities are reasonably close, I can see myself driving out there every so often for more fun dance adventures. 

Even though it was chilly outside, we danced enough that the weather kept us comfortably cool instead of shivering through our swingouts. After the last song, we took a few pictures and hung out for a bit while helping pack up and making sure we left the park in good shape before heading home. The weather, music, dancing, and great company all made for a wonderful night out in the park. I’m glad I went this year and I’m looking forward to going back next year. 

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