Over the last few years, I’ve gotten much better at choosing my words carefully. Not just what I say but how and when I say it. This also includes knowing when something warrants a response and when it’s better left alone.
I used to respond to everything I could, even when it wasn’t directed at me. This lead to many long, unnecessary arguments that caused a lot of frustration (at least on my part) and wasted a ton of time. Even if I had a good point and did a good job articulating it, my responses rarely convinced anyone to change their mind or consider an alternative position. More often than not, all that needlessly responding did was put me in a bad mood for most of the day and make me think badly about the other people involved in the exchange. Eventually, I got to the point that I had to stop for my own sake.
There were some things that I completely stopped responding to for a good while. It was difficult at first to resist the urge to jump in, but it got easier over time. At this point, there are a few subjects that I almost never discuss anymore, several that I only engage in when I’m in the proper mental state to do so, and plenty that I freely talk about because I can easily choose to respond properly to them. While I still get the urge to respond to something I should ignore (and occasionally give into that urge), I’m much more capable of avoiding that now than I used to be. As a result, my conversations are much more fruitful as well as enjoyable, I’m a lot more productive with my time, and my mood has improved tremendously. This is one of many seemingly small changes that has made a huge positive difference in my life and I’m glad I chose it.