The driving force behind so many actions is fear. Fear of failure, fear of being hurt, fear of not being liked, fear of losing control, fear of loss, fear of the unknown, and countless other types of fear. Instead of dissolving or overcoming that fear, many people are controlled by their fear and act (or react, to put it more accurately) based on it. Although this can manifest in different ways, it always introduces some degree of negativity whenever it appears.
Some people avoid others or act aggressively around them. In both cases, their actions are largely based on the fear of being hurt by other people, so they either try to hide or scare them away. Either course of action may backfire and bring to them the very thing they tried to avoid, such as increased attention or possibly even violence; even when one of those courses of action works as intended, it reinforces behavior that almost always causes problems elsewhere in life for whoever practices them.
There are many cases in which people desire power over others. In most of these cases, this desires comes from their fear that other people may harm them if have the power to do so. Whether or not anyone else actually wants power over them or wants to harm them (which may be a projection of their own desires onto others) is irrelevant because their fear is based on an idea created by their mind. That provides enough motivation for them to try grabbing that power before anyone else can get it and use it against them. Hence the violence and desperation around most power struggles.
There are many possible positive or negative outcomes for any given situation. Wanting the outcomes to be positive is perfectly understandable, but worrying about them does nothing to facilitate that. All that does is make it impossible to enjoy a situation and increase the chances of a negative outcome. Someone who’s afraid is trapped by their mind and can’t be comfortable or content. If fear keeps them trapped, then overcoming fear is what sets them free.
Learning how to relax, stay present, and hold space for oneself is essential for having the peace of mind required to vanquish fear. When fear is defeated, there is room for love to enter and begin to heal. The only way two people can truly be close to each other is when love has replaced fear in their relationship. This is difficult since so much of what goes on in the world is based on fear, but a relationship built around love is the strongest and most healing type of relationship. The world would be virtually unrecognizable if love relationships were the norm, and I hope to live long enough to see that happen.