Acting in Haste

Acting in haste can be hard to avoid, especially if it’s a habit that you’ve had for most of your life. Even though habits can be changed, doing so takes a lot of time, energy, and intention. It also involves getting past the ego and that is often the hardest task of all.

Once something is said, it can’t be taken back. It can be forgiven if there is willingness on the part of the recipient and this could be an opportunity for the relationship to grow by working through conflict. However, don’t say things out of anger for the express purpose of creating an opportunity to work through something. If you truly want to improve a relationship, then your ego must be quiet for you to succeed.

This doesn’t mean you can never express your feelings. All it means is that it’s best to do so in a mindful way. There is likely a way to word what’s on your mind so that your intentions are clear while still staying true to your feelings. You could also try describing what you’re feeling in your emotions and your physical body rather than attacking or blaming the other person.

Something I’ve found helpful is to think about what I feel like saying and how I’ll probably feel about having said it later on based on past experience in similar situations. If I’ll regret saying it later, then I do my best to avoid saying it in the present. This is difficult to do in the heat of the moment but it gets easier with practice and it’s worth doing as it prevents so many problems.

This post was inspired by a recent example of me acting in haste based off an assumption and saying something I regretted. Fortunately I reconciled with the other person and I’ve worked through most of my own emotions around the situation so it was a good learning experience for me. One that, I hope, will be the final time I make that mistake. I hope you also learn from my experience so that you don’t have to make the same mistake for yourself.