Since I first started my self-improvement journey in 2017, I’ve come across countless ideas. I’ve tried out many of them but now I only use a small handful. Sometimes it took a long time to see if they actually worked as well as those advocating for them claim they do. In other cases, the ideas worked well, and I used them until I found better ideas. The small handful I have used for many years have stood the test of time. Because of this, I wanted to share some questions I use to evaluate ideas from the many people in the self-improvement world so that I don’t end up in trouble after blindly following someone who gives out bad recommendations. Here are four simple questions you can use to navigate the vast ocean of advice and find the sunken treasure within.
- Is what they’re saying sensible and logically consistent? This is a quick way to sort the good advice from the bad. If someone is advising something that makes no sense and becomes more confusing the more it’s explained, or is inconsistent with itself, then you know right away to avoid following it. This question alone can eliminate lots of unhelpful options so you can better explore the helpful ones.
- Do they follow their own advice? Countless people say one thing and do another. That is unfortunately also true in the world of self-improvement. Someone who doesn’t follow their own advice is going to avoid any harm from bad practices; those who follow that advice will, unfortunately, be hurt. For those who do practice what they preach, though, the results aren’t always positive. Bad advice and counterproductive actions will make anyone’s life worse. That’s why it’s crucial to only listen to those who talk about things worth doing and walk their talk.
- Has anyone else benefited? Some self-improvement gurus, especially those with a huge amount of disposable income, are able to get away with a lot of things that ordinary folks can’t. It’s super easy to take excellent care of yourself and allocate plenty of time for your activities if you have enough passive income to forgo a day job and pay others to complete many of your tasks. The true test of any self-improvement idea comes when it’s used by someone who is of modest means and is often occupied with work, family, stress, etc. If it passes with those people, then it’s worth checking out.
- Does it work for you? I don’t see nearly enough focus on how individual differences mean that what’s safe and effective varies greatly from one person to another, particularly in the area of health and wellbeing. Food allergies are a good example. Someone I know will die from eating peanuts unless she gets immediate medical attention. Someone else I know will feel sick after eating peanuts, but he won’t die. I feel perfectly fine after eating peanuts. Those are three very different responses to the exact same food. How much greater are the variety and severity of responses from exercise programs, drugs, diets, etc.? I’ve read a lot about animal loss after my dog Sawyer’s death. Much of it helped me feel better, especially anything that involved big emotional releases. I don’t know how much of that would help someone else who has lost a beloved animal friend, which is one reason I rarely give advice to anyone in that situation. I’ve been at this long enough to know that even if something works well for everyone else on Earth, it could still be bad for me, and vice versa.