From what I’ve seen, it’s getting harder and harder to find good storytelling. This is not caused by a lack of good storytellers. There are plenty of excellent storytellers who can keep others engaged for hours with all kinds of fascinating, gripping, and entertaining stories. The best storytellers can even hold attention with stories that aren’t that interesting; their delivery is what makes those stories enjoyable. Unfortunately, it’s becoming more difficult for those skilled storytellers to shine because there are increasingly fewer people who are good at listening to the stories.
Interruptions are the primary symptom. It seems almost universal nowadays for humans to cut in whenever there’s a pause, whether it’s a pause for dramatic effect or to catch one’s breath before continuing. They’ll also interrupt to ask questions that are meant to be answered throughout the course of the story, hurry along the storyteller instead of listening patiently, focus exclusively on one particular part of the story instead of absorbing all of it, and finish the speaker’s sentences when they think they know the outcome.
I think the source of this issue is a lack of presence. Rather than being present with what’s happening around them, it seems almost everyone is always focused on where they think the story is going, the questions they want to ask, advice they want to give, what they did yesterday, what they’ll do tomorrow, and so on. The part I find strange about this is that many of these folks will also read long, dense book series and avoid spoilers at all costs so they don’t learn early on about information that’s revealed much later in the stories. Despite this, they seem either unable or unwilling to wait a few minutes to hear the outcome of a story without trying to jump ahead, ask questions every time there’s a pause, or start telling a different story of their own. That dissonance is so strange to me.
Frequently, I’ll keep talking after someone interrupts me. This sometimes results in the other person quieting down once they realize I still have something to say. On many occasions, however, the other person has continued talking over me. If I stopped talking at that point, as I used to do nearly every time this occurred, they’d carry on as if nothing had happened. Whenever I’ve continued talking through their interruption and they continue interrupting, both of us can talk simultaneously for anywhere from 15-30 seconds. I can’t understand anything they say and I doubt they understand anything I say. When this happens, I find some solace by finishing my thought instead of ceasing to talk as soon as they interrupt me. I still don’t understand why anyone continues to speak over someone when that person is still speaking at length.
Listening extensively to what someone else has to say sometimes results in them returning the favor by giving me plenty of room to talk. However, this is no guarantee that that will happen. It can sometimes result in them talking even more. I often feel tired after listening to someone tell a long story, which makes it much harder for me to hold the floor when it’s my turn to speak. Some folks, even after talking at length, seem to perk up and jump in shortly after I start talking. This usually results in me quieting down due to not having the energy to keep talking or ask for room to talk. Talking can be difficult for me even when I feel good, and it’s almost impossible when I feel tired.
I so appreciate those who do listen with few to no interruptions, even when I have a lengthy story to tell or point to make. One of the things I miss a lot about my dog Sawyer is how he listened to me. He’d often bark or growl at something, but he’d quiet down, look at me, and listen to what I said when I called out his name. Plenty of other animals I’ve met have acted similarly. That’s a huge reason I often feel much more comfortable around animals than I do around humans. Humans can learn a lot from animals about many aspects of communication. I hope they listen.